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This week has been miserable for me. I graduate in less than fourteen days. Ordinarily, I would be incredibly excited about that. However, I don't have a job lined up for after I graduate. I kind of feel like I'm jumping out of an aeroplane without a parachute. I've been really excited about a certain job that I applied for, but it looks like it probably won't work out. I'm at a loss for what to do next.

Last night, I had a horrible migraine — definately the worst that I've had in some time. Since I can't take ibuprofen on an empty stomach, David and I went out to get some midnight McDonald's. While we were going through the drive-through, we talked about it some.

I subscribe to the school that God isn't necessarily going to make sure that your life turns out well. Augustine once said, “God provides the wind, but man must raise the sails.”¹ Essentially, what I believe is that God's will will be made manifest regardless. However, we are often the instruments for carrying out his will. Therefore, it is not good for us to simply neglect our callings.

David was reassuring me that everything would be good in the end. I presented my view that that's not always the case. People trust in God all the time and end up in bad situations. I presented a few to him. David's response was just a simple “so what”.

I thought of people who died for Christ — contemporary martyrs. They trust in God completely and yet end up in bad situations. However, when you think about it, what is the issue with that. “Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.”²

I came to realise one critical point: everyone's destiny is death.³ After all, after death, we all get what's coming to us. In the end, there will be no problems or issues with us since we'll essentially be living in a perfect communion with God. If that's what I'm destined for, why should I worry? Nothing in this life is important in the long scheme of things.

Somehow, I still don't exactly subscribe to this no-worries philosophy, yet I am more at ease with the idea of letting God be God.

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1. I once wrote a letter to the campus newspaper about this. Trust in God, but steer away from the rocks.
2. Matthew 5:10 (NIV)
3. Ecclesiastes 7:12