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So, I read the paper today. That's what young, urban wannabe professionals do, right — read the paper?

I made my way to the editorial and opinion section of the Rocky Mountain News. Right there was an editorial about the “latest casualty of [the] soft economy… bottled water.”¹

Okay, I know that I've been ranting and raving lately about the waste of today's society. I know, even I'm getting tired of it. I really wish that I could write about life experiences such as about the finer places in town to eat at and the best wines to go along with it or about the beauty of human intimacy or about the evils of my old high school. Well… I'm broke, nobody likes me and my old high school becomes less funny the more and more that I think about it.² With nothing else to write about and with no job to occupy my time, you're going to hear about bottled water.

Essentially, sales of bottled water have taken an enormous hit. “It appears that common sense and tap water are making a comeback.” The editorial lists the price discrepancy as the main culprit. For example, it costs over four hundred dollars for a year's supply of the cheapest brand of bottled water at standard consumption rates. Compare that with only fifty-one cents per year for garden-variety tap water. I did the math, and that's less then two tenths of a percent!

I'm reminded of a Weekend Update quote from Saturday Night Live a few years ago: “A study by the World Wildlife Fund reveals that bottled water is not any safer or healthier than tap water — just more expensive. The announcement has triggered residents of Beverly Hills to go out and buy thousands of bottles of tap water.”³

Jokes aside, I'm sure that it's important to point out the negative effects of bottled water (besides just being a money drain). As any environmentalist would tell you, one way to reduce the use of energy is to buy locally. Locally purchased products don't involve wasting enormous amounts of fuel to transport products such as food halfway around the world that could be grown in your very own county. With that in mind, think about where bottled water comes from. I know that many advertise as coming from places such as Canada, Argentina and Fiji. Imagine the savings in energy that could be made if you just drank from the faucet. Also, think about the one billion people on this earth who don't have access to clean water. Some of this bottled water is being taken away from those very people in areas where water is a scarcity.⁴

I know that I keep saying that this poor economy is really doing miracles for us as a society in changing our bad habits — even if it is because of cheapbastardism instead of more noble goals. I wouldn't mind having a good economy at all; indeed, I'm trying to find a job in it. Still, it just disappoints me that once the economy recovers, the cheapbastardism that's stimulating our change will disappear, and then we're right back at where we started.

On a side note, with the DNC coming to town in August, I don't know whether I should go downtown to rally with the Democrats or to protest against them. Perhaps I could alternate my schedule on different days.

1. “Latest casualty of soft economy? Bottled water”, editorial, Rocky Mountain News 2008 June 19: 38.
2. Now, it's no longer funny and just plain sad.
3. http://snltranscripts.jt.org/00/00rupdate.phtml
4. http://www.coopamerica.org/pubs/realmoney/articles/waterfilters.cfm — read the bottom of the page.